Since this is a milestone blog, my 100th blog, what better to write about than puke and poop?

Disclaimer, you may not want to continue reading if you have a weak stomach.

I have spent the last two days, and nights, dealing with puke and poop.  While I was scrubbing the poop off of the toilet seat, edge of the tub, and the bathroom floor yesterday, I laughed out loud at myself.  Only I would laugh and think, “Wow, this is going to make an awesome blog post!”

I chose my words carefully as I titled this post, “How does a blind mom handle a puky and poopy day?”

I’ll tell you how?  I literally, “HANDLE,” it.  Yes, quite literally, that’s the only way to know if you’ve got all of it up.

Let’s begin with Thursday afternoon.  As I prepared dinner, Jackson ran past the kitchen, ” I have to go poopoo!”  So what?  He announces every time he runs to relieve himself.  Only this time, instead of hearing the toilet flushing and the sink running, I hear the bath water get turned on.  I make my way to see what’s going on to find Jackson in the tub scrubbing his bottom with soap.  “I poop mama, and I wipe myself, and washing my butt.”  Ok, that’s great, takes care of the bath I was going to have to handle later.  I left him to cleaning himself, picked up his pants and tossed them on the bathroom counter for the time being while I had to check the pasta.  A few minutes later, I returned to check on him and turn the water off.  It still smelled awful in there.  Then… I realized why.

Checking to see if there was still poop floating in the toilet, I found it.  The smeers on the toilet seat.  Then I noticed the mile long drapery of toilet paper so commonly found in houses with toddlers, and as I began rolling the roll back up, my fingers stuck to the paper, and I found it again.  He was too adorable to be grosed out by.  He’d tried wiping himself, but never tore the paper off the roll.  Then… I found it again… when I pulled his underpants out from his sweats and felt the nice lump in the fabric.  There it was.  We haven’t had one of these in months. Poop in the underpants.  Those underpants went straight to the trash outside.  I washed my hands with soap, grabbed the bleach spray, and an old rag, and proceeded to scrub the toilet.

Now let’s move along to 4:00am Friday morning.  All night long Marley had whined and whimpered that her tummy was hurting.  All of a sudden she flew out of my bed, which she’s allowed to sleep in when daddy’s at work, yelling, “I have to throw up!”  If you are just starting to follow my blog, than you don’t know that vomit has been a pretty frequent visitor in our home.  So frequent, that my daughter knows to run to the toilet, trash can, or best of all requests for a throw up bowl to keep next to her when she’s not feeling well.  After that first explosion was over, I rubbed some essential oils on her tummy.  I’m not much into western medicine by the way.  My poor baby whaled as I cradled her in my lap.  I knew exactly how she felt, because that’s how I’d felt the night before.  There is a painful stomach bug loose in our house. Suddenly, she jerked off my lap and before reaching the toilet vomitted again on the floor.  Great… time to wake up, and clean up.

For the next 24 hours, I went through a lot of towels, bleach spray, hand soap, and the kids went through a lot of clothes.  One after the other, that stomach bug was making it’s way out of my babies out both ends.  To ensure that I got it all, I had to really, “handle,” the problem by feeling around in order to make sure there is no mess left behind.  Are those new chips and cracks in that toilet seat, or is that poop?  How far did the vomit splatter that time.  Oh great, I didn’t catch it all in the bowl.  Hurray!  It’s 1:00am and there’s vomit in my bed.

Thank goodness I don’t have a weak stomach, and thank goodness everyone is starting to feel better.  I am crossing my fingers that all goes well tonight.

Cheers to a restful night, to us one and all!